Sunday, February 6, 2011

That Spells 'Mannish Boy'

Now Nairobi has no shortage of Pretty Boys or Pretty Young Things -more commonly referred to as Twinks-. I recently met one of those. I was feeling kinda lonely and old and so in a fit of desperation I put up a profile on (que drum roll) GAYDAR (facebook for fags as my friend puts it). Naturally I had reservations about the whole idea. For one I am really really genuinely paranoid - to much Crime and Investigation I think and two no Disney movie ever started with a pretty damsel logging on to a computer trawling for sex. Anyway I threw caution to the wind and a bunch of other silly analogies and in no time I found HIM. We exchanged numbers, became facebook friends and I was pleasantly surprised by his pictures. Yes he was HOT, a quality that Kenyan men are not particularly known for.

We soon met up, he was better looking n person and had a sort of rakish air around him that oozed confidence and some to the effect that 'I'm the shit'. Anyway our initial encounter was OK - no fireworks there. We talked about general stuff, friends we had in common, family, where we went to school. And before I forget he was slightly older than me, OK 5 years older. Anyway as time went on he became I begun to realise how little we had in common. For instance he liked the kind of music that came out of a computer, I liked anything made before 1975. In fact the more we talked the older I felt. My Knight in shinning armour begun to look like a little boy - a Mannish Boy.

What especially annoyed and fascinated me was his self-confidence. For instance here one phone conversation went like this:

ME: Your good looking chap
HIM: I know
ME: Do you want to rephrase that statement, maybe think about it a little?
HIM: Nope
ME: I'm going to hang up now!

And I did. The cheeky little shit! I couldn't believe the ego and the nerve on him. Anyway I soon lost my rose-coloured glasses and saw him for what he was, a selfish prick. And then the voice in my head screamed 'The writing's on the wall bitch!' And sure enough the signs were all there. He once kept me waiting for him at a popular Westie hangout for 2 freaking hours without a call or text until one of my Girl friends hit me on the head and said "This nigga aint coming. Ebu, where is your dignity?" And she had a point, that and she was looking to get hammered on the cheap. Later that week he came up with some lame excuse that went something like "Where were you that night?"

Anyway the point of all this is that looks and age can be deceiving. The Mannish Boy like the one in that Muddy Waters' song has grown up in a bubble. In this case this guy's looks rendered him into a state of permanent immaturity. It may be true to say that we didn't hit it off and that there were not mutual feelings of giddy romance -maybe lust- but I felt slightly mistreated and maybe just a tad used. Anyway Nairobi s full of theses Mannish Boys and many people are oblivious to it.

Muddy Waters, the original Mannish Boy

As a general rule of thumb, if a guy or gal dosen't call/ txt and stands you up without explanation then you best be running in the opposite direction!


Tamaku said...

Far from it, looks aren't everything. You want someone you can see yourself with years later sitting on the porch enjoying sunsets. Anyhow, did you manage to keep your pants on ama there was some steamy sex, don't be shy...

Mũdũ wa Mũmbi said...

@Tamaku: A gentleman never kisses and tells. Unfortunately I stuck to my Catholic school upbringing. That been said, I asked around and a good friend of mine told me that he was not the sharpest tool in the box but then again I was probably looking for my carbon copy - same interests, tastes, politics etc. I actually didn't see any future with him other than a wet dream and being a name on a very very very long list.

Anonymous said...


1. Was he at least as cute as the guy in the pic?
2. How easy is it to find a decent young (25 and below) guy in Nairobi? And one who's my type of Nairobian to boot (doesn't speak with a rural accent, dresses decently, middle-class)?
3. I hear white Kenyan guys have a hard time meeting decent guys because everyone assumes they're rich as sees them as another source of income. Just throwing that out there.
4. Keep blogging about your life, it's what got me hooked to the blog in the first place.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and what's the best way to meet decent guys? Going to artsy shit/ prowling in Yaya/ bars/ online/ something else?

Mũdũ wa Mũmbi said...

@Anonymous: If I knew where to meet guys, I'd probably be doing other things. Needless to say most queer guys in Nairobi are on the DL. The outside bar (next to the DJ stand) at Gypsie's is a good place to start for your run-of-the-mill Nairobi queerling - some of them are cute.

I go for artsy shit all the time and nobody ever approaches me but then again people tell me I have a straight vibe going on which I'm trying to work on.

And yes the dude was hot - in fact he is WIDELY considered to be cute and as such he is a big ol SLUT!

Post a Comment

Copyright © Man and Boy
Blogger Theme by BloggerThemes Design by