Sunday, March 13, 2011

She Loves You, Yeah Yeah Yeah!

Kenyan gay bloggers are the most eccentric, bold, over-the-top and wisest people I have ever not met. A treasure-chest of wisdom and advice, and endless drama. I have been struggling with an issue that is not new tomost gay men in Nairobi - the Heterosexual Woman.

I consider myself a sorta OK looking chap and therefore it is not shocking when I occasionally (and very rarely indeed) get approached by nice girls. Usually my apparent lack of action (SHUT UP AND STRIP!) leads them to wander off exactly as they came in and peruse other men who will hopefully make the shut up and strip. This was true until I met (oh, let me see now) Toni (with an I). She was a pretty girl with a crush on me. Something Ihoped would wear off over time. It didn't. We had several mutual friends which meant we always me, usually in a less than ideal situation (me drunk at Bacchus, me drunk at Qs or her drunk at Galileos) one thing usually led to another and we would end up conducting oral examinations.

Kissing a girl is for a more a kind of perverse clinical exercise, it's exiting in a way I know is wrong but irresistible nonetheless. For her of course it was confirmation of my love for her (and she did love me). My friends were not impressed with my behaviour and the accused me of leading her on. Tamaku and Sinai Siaf are two people who have written extensively about this. I liked this girl but not in a way that wold ever satisfy her.

So one day, or rather late one night after several beers I told her that I like men. In the dimness of the bar I saw sadness cross her face. She was a good sport and took it in her stride with flinching or resorting to violence (or heaven forbid, tears). Again she said she loved me. I told her I knew. She said she would never meet someone like me and I said of course she will, she's young, pretty and smart. I also told that she was special and we agreed to say friends.

Coming out to Toni was the hardest one I'd done, and I'm out to a lot of people. The emotions involved had forced me to postpone telling her so as to protect her feelings, her pride and her honour. I destroyed that in one go, and it made me very sad. At the end of the day it was either me or her, she deserved to know the truth but I told her for my own selfish reasons rather that anything else. I did the right thing but at what cost?

We don't talk anymore and sometimes I think it's for the best. She'll come around one day...

Toni sometimes reminds me of Esparanza: beautiful, talented and bootlylicous.

I'm very grateful for all the insights that I get from all the queer blogs I follow. The made it possible for young guys like me to live out and proud. I want to thank all of you wherever you are for helping us live in TRUTH - a luxury very few of us can afford.

The Boys Are Back in Town

After a short stint abroad, Sauti Sol flew into town triumphant and bearing a near sacred follow up album. Here's my two-cents on the hullaballoo.

A good friend of mine gave me this album recently. Of course Sauti Sol's forst album 'Mwanzo' was one of my favourite last year so I was eager to have a listen which in my book means playing the same song over and over again. I made a very technical appearance at their album launch a couple of weeks ago (very loud, very crowded, lots of pretty people) and I noticed the even was touted as the launch of their sophomore album which for we non-american folk simply means it's their second album. They sound pretty good live, and are furiously energetic.

So the question is have the Fab Four matured since 2008's Mwanzo? The short answer is yes, the themes have gotten somewhat more serious take for example 'Mbinguni' the album's first track. Of coures there are the mellow love ballads like 'Coming Home' that echo their previous work and the insanely catchy 'Soma Kijana'. My personal favourite and is 'Awinja' an instrument sparse but vocally stunning piece that allows we, the listener to busk in their subliminal arrangement and depth. The song is melancholic and heartbreaking beautiful. The album's title however may tad over the top, but aren't all boy bands?

So, Sauti Sol offers little gems of life, love and loss - a veritable soundtrack to life.


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